Ethereum (ETH), lonely prince in a vast kingdom of intangible coins, was not plucked from a magician’s hat by Fundstrat’s Tom Lee for his crypto strategy, no matter what the village gossips say. Adriano Feria, that tireless investigator of Ethereum’s eccentric habits, has peered beneath the velvet curtain to reveal the curious anatomy of Bitmine Immersion’s $8.8 billion gamble. Oh, the dramas behind every digital ledger!
Why Did Tom Lee Choose Ethereum? A Researcher Sighs Deeply
Ethereum (ETH), apparently, has managed to seduce Bitmine’s crypto strategists not by wearing the finest silks, but by simply playing reliable host for stablecoins, DeFi, and all things that can be tokenized-like one’s patience. According to Adriano Feria, scribbling furiously on X, the decision to crowbar Ethereum into the centerpiece role was less random than your uncle’s karaoke song at midnight.
Forgive me my frankness-manners, after all, are optional on the internet-but those folks still grumbling about ETH and tossing tomatoes at Mr. Lee should really get a hobby.
Tom Lee didn’t just spin his office chair and stab at a chart. He chose ETH because the market, in a fit of orderliness, has deemed it the “default” for stablecoins, the kind of respect you usually only expect after a very impressive mustache grows in.
– AdrianoFeria.eth 🦇🔊 🛡️ (@AdrianoFeria) August 24, 2025
Bitmine’s little scheme, meanwhile, gathered momentum not by sheer luck but because Ethereum shaped itself into something between a bank and a bustling bazaar-an “Internet of Finance.” The weary titans of TradFi are peeking over the fence, eager to get their hands on the spoils without ever touching an actual coin. How modern, how hygienic!
Now, products like BMNR are to billionaires what disguised taverns were to traveling Russian aristocrats: a cozy place to accumulate wealth out of sight. But don’t imagine Fundstrat is having this dance alone, warns Feria; the ballroom is positively stuffed with other hedge funders who skipped etiquette lessons.
ETH treasuries are not merely DATs-no, no, take a look at the dancers on the floor and the size of their wallets. There’s serious coin being tossed around, sometimes literally.
The researcher, weary from years of dodging pie-throwers, insists corporate crypto treasuries are bored of the old “BTC game,” preferring instead Ethereum’s lively “Internet of Finance,” where transactions flutter around like moths at a lamplight. Oh, and ETH managed all this, technologically and financially, despite enduring a decade of heckling from “no-coiners” and disgruntled insiders. The coin doth protest, but it also persisteth.
Bitmine Gorges On $2.2 Billion ETH In Seven Days, Earns Bragging Rights And Possible Indigestion
Thus, Ethereum (ETH)-in the eyes of those who squint at ledgers-now glimmers as a superior Store of Value over a ten-year stretch, putting Bitcoin (BTC) and the drab chorus of altcoins to shame.
Guided-one imagines-by Tom Lee’s dramatic gestures, Bitmine Immersion stands atop the mountain of influential crypto treasury firms, waving its ledger at passers-by. In one week, Bitmine sucked up $2.2 billion in ETH, swelling its treasuries above $8.8 billion. At this rate, Bitmine and its rivals may soon own more ETH than the Ethereum Foundation itself, prompting a quiet existential crisis among the Foundation’s staff. 🤯🤑
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2025-08-25 17:14