TL;DR
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It appears, my dear reader, that countless analysts perched upon the digital birch trees of X whisper feverish dreams: ADA shall soar, not unlike the price of wheat after a poor harvest, reaching even the lofty heights of $5! One wonders whether these men are driven by conviction or by the same spirit that overtakes peasants gambling at cards. 🤔
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Hope! The eternal muse of the Russian soul, now yoked to the American SEC, whose bureaucrats, devoted as monks to their rituals, have postponed deliverance (approval) to October 26, 2025. Yet, fortune-tellers-here called “Polymarket”-predict with a trembling certainty of 83% that the day will come before year’s end, when ADA shall be free (or at least marginally less oppressed). 💼
Shall the Rally Be Majestic, or Merely a Passing Rumble?
In those august days now vanished-mid-August, to be precise-the currency known as ADA poked its head above $1, crowing as if it were more than a chicken pecking at crumbs. Presently, it languishes at $0.86-hardly cause to order the factory bells rung, nearly a 3% monthly gain (enough, perhaps, to buy a small loaf of bread, not a revolution). 🥖
The marketplace (Crypto X) bustles with speculation as thick as the air on a Moscow winter morning. An analyst by the name of CryptoBullet, choked with nostalgia for years past, compared ADA’s trajectory to previous epochs and now prophesies a spike to $1.70-$2.10 in the coming months. Oh, how the candle flickers-that hope eternal! 🔥
Hailey LUNC surveys the monthly chart and, in an excess of enthusiasm worth a toast of vodka, pronounces it “incredibly bullish,” staking her claim at $2.50. The peasants rejoice, for if wishes grew on trees, the forests of Siberia would run blue with ADA! 🌲
Another soul, whose identity is lost among the pines, swears upon his favorite cryptocurrency that ADA shall ascend to $3-$5. Should this miracle occur, it would be a pump of nearly 500%-far greater than the pay raise offered by the estate manager after a good potato harvest! 🥔
Crypto Tony, possessed of 500,000 followers (an entire provincial town!), hints with mysterious solemnity that he will open a long position should ADA reclaim $0.96. We wish him the luck of Napoleon at Borodino-perhaps more, given the outcome. 🎩
ADA ETF: Regulatory Chess, or Bureaucratic Ballet?
Among all the mystical influences that might drive Cardano’s fortunes to heights unseen, lies the hope surrounding the first spot ADA ETF in the United States. This dream, wrapped in layers of paperwork and officialdom, is said to make direct exposure possible for the enterprising investor. Both peasant and prince would be able to buy shares (likely through a brokerage, not a horse-drawn cart), while their ADA would be kept safe-like gold under the tsarina’s pillow. 🛏️
The prestigious Grayscale (a digital asset custodian not unlike a stern but kindly landowner) filed its wishes to the SEC in February. The regulator, ever capricious, delayed its answer until October 26, 2025. Yet, Polymarket, undeterred by bureaucracy, insists-nay, bet their samovars-on an 83% chance of approval before the frost sets in. 🍂
And so the saga continues, filled with hope and speculation, bureaucracy and bold predictions. In the spirit of Tolstoy: everyone believes the sun will surely rise, but only the cleverest farmers plant potatoes before it does. 🌄
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2025-08-27 18:29