ETH: Will It Moon or Just…Fizzle? 🚀

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So, it appears our esteemed public companies – those bastions of prudence and long-term vision – have decided, quite suddenly, that Ether is the thing. Ninety-five percent of all the ETH they possess? Acquired in the last three months? One suspects someone forgot to check the price beforehand. 🧐 Perhaps they all simultaneously received a very persuasive pamphlet.

“Watch this space,” declares Bitwise, with the air of a magician revealing a rather obvious rabbit. Truly, a thrilling proclamation. The suspense is… palpable. They’ve added a mere 4.4 million ETH, a trifling sum, really, representing a growth of almost two thousand percent. Just 27 companies involved, naturally. Because twenty-eight would be simply excessive.

95% of all ETH held by public companies was purchased in the past quarter alone.

Watch this space.

Corporate ETH Adoption, Q3 2025 Edition

– Bitwise (@BitwiseInvest) October 15, 2025

A Supply Squeeze? More Like a Mild Constriction

Five point nine million ETH nestled in digital asset treasuries. That’s, oh, roughly five percent of the total supply. The world will end, or something. BitMine Immersion Technologies, with its insatiable appetite, holds more than half of it – a glorious three million! They’re aiming for five percent of the total supply. Ambitious, I say. Like a pigeon attempting to hoard all the crumbs in a park. They even scooped up another 104,336 ETH whilst Ether took a little nap below $4,000. Astute! Very astute. 🙄

Some fellow named ‘Crypto Gucci’-a name that fills one with a certain foreboding-mumbles about “supply vacuums.” Apparently, a significant portion of Ether is locked away, rendered… well, unspendable. A perfectly reasonable basis for a “nuclear” price surge, naturally.

ETFs have inhaled 6.84 million ETH, staking a further 35.7 million – essentially holding it hostage in the digital ether. Forty percent of the supply? Vanished. Gone. Presumably to a secret lair. It is all perfectly logical, if you’ve recently partaken of particularly potent mushrooms.

MASSIVE:$ETH SUPPLY IS EVAPORATING.

$24B HELD BY TREASURIES.

$28B LOCKED IN SPOT ETFS.

$146B STAKED MOST ILLIQUID.

40% OF THE ENTIRE SUPPLY IS GONE FROM CIRCULATION.

THIS IS THE SETUP FOR AN ETHEREUM SUPERCYCLE.

– Merlijn The Trader (@MerlijnTrader) October 15, 2025

The Retreat Continues (Naturally)

And yet, despite all this breathless excitement, Ether is… falling. A curious phenomenon! It seems the Americans wake up, yawn, and decide to sell. A perfectly understandable reaction, really. Why hold onto something when one can simply generate paper profits? Humanity’s age-old struggle. It meanders around $4,200 and $4,000. As if unable to decide its ultimate fate. Down 19% from its peak… How utterly *disappointing*. One had expected a more dramatic collapse. 🙃

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2025-10-16 08:31