Transak Licenses Every State Except Alaska… Wait, Why Do We Have 50? 🧐

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Transak’s six new state licenses? Groundbreaking stuff! Now they can legally take your money and turn it into stablecoins without accidentally violating some obscure 1923 banking law. Who knew compliance could be this thrilling? 🎉

  • Transak now has 11 state licenses-because apparently, 10 wasn’t enough to sleep at night. Michigan, South Carolina, and others are now “regulated,” which means they’ll charge you $5 extra for the privilege of pretending to care about your funds. 💸
  • They’re basically the Boy Scouts of crypto compliance. “Be prepared!” they yell while hoarding licenses like they’re coupons for free pizza. 🍕

On Nov. 11, Transak announced they got licenses from six states. Michigan, South Carolina, Iowa, Kansas, Pennsylvania, and Vermont-because who wouldn’t want stablecoins in Vermont? 🏞️

This brings their total to 11 states. A “methodical campaign,” they call it. Which is just a fancy way of saying they’re terrified of getting fined by regulators. Bryan Keane, their compliance chief, said the licenses are “critical steps toward a future where fiat and crypto coexist.” Translation: “We’ll comply until we don’t have to anymore.” 😏

“Every new license brings us closer to seamless, lawful money-moving,” Keane said. “Our team’s relentless focus on compliance… and building trust with regulators.” Yeah, nothing says “trust” like 11 licenses and a website that costs $300/year to maintain. 🏗️

Transak’s “Regulated Rails”: Because Banks Are So Last Year

These licenses let Transak handle your funds directly-no third parties! Which is great, unless you consider that “directly” just means they can blame you when things go wrong. 🙃

The U.S. market is “complex,” they admit. Which is code for “we’re spending 80% of our budget on lawyers.” But hey, their “long-term commitment” includes ACH payments and MetaMask partnerships. Because nothing says “trust” like turning your bank account into a crypto wallet. 💻

2025 is their “breakout year,” they claim. After enabling wire transfers in August, they’re now obsessed with ACH. And don’t get me started on their MetaMask deal-letting you send money to a wallet “instantly” because obviously we all need to send $5 to a stranger’s MetaMask at 2 AM. 🌙

They support USDC, RLUSD, USDG, and “Virtual Account APIs.” Which sounds technical until you realize it’s just a glorified form for people to send each other money. Again, with licenses. 🎓

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2025-11-11 20:11