Crypto Crisis or Just Another Johnson & Johnson? 🤔

Well now, folks, it appears that the House bunch, the GOP, has gone and dug up some dusty old skeletons from the closet of Washington’s financial playbook. Turns out, over the past few years, no less than thirty crypto firms have been gently uninvited from the banking dance, all thanks to what they’re calling “Operation Chokepoint 2.0”-sounds like a fancy new recipe, but it’s likely just another way to squeeze the life out of digital money. 🧟‍♂️

It seems the investigation, which kicked off in the 118th Congress-about the time folks were still arguing whether to burn or fry their tax returns-discovered that the Biden crew has been employing all sorts of vague rules and dark spells to scare banks away from dealing with digital assets. Like a snake oil salesman at a county fair, they use “informal guidance” and “enforcement actions”-that’s fancy talk for “we’re watching you, buddy,”-to keep crypto from playing in the banks’ backyard. 🕵️‍♂️

Biden’s War on Crypto: A Comedy of Errors

And the chairman of this committee, old Hill, didn’t bite his tongue-he said targeting folks over their political leanings is as American as apple pie, but it sure makes folks lose trust quicker than a gambler in a dark alley. And yet, he’s optimistic-hoping that under President Trump, who signed some shiny crypto bills (the GENIUS Act and maybe the CLARITY Act-these sound like games at a county fair, but they’re supposed to be serious), the tide might turn. 🌊🎩

The report dripping with sarcasm mentions “informal communications”-that’s government code for “we ain’t got no rules, but we sure do have a lot of opinions.” They used to call it “regulation,” but now it’s more like “regulating by paranoia.”

Regulators Playing Hide and Seek: Missed Opportunities or Just Lazy?

The Republicans sure didn’t hold back-they say the Biden administration, instead of creating a clear, reliable set of rules, decided to wing it. That’s akin to trying to build a ship with no plans and hoping it won’t sink. Meanwhile, these regulators-Federal Reserve, FDIC, OCC-acted like a bunch of schoolyard bullies with badges, throwing enforcement punches instead of offering guidance. 💼🔫

Subcommittee Chairman Meuser joked that the Biden era of regulation looks suspiciously like the Obama days, only with a fancier coat of paint-and lots of offshore companies doing the limbo to escape the clampdown. He praises the folks who, under Trump’s leadership, tried to make things fair (or at least less crazy). He’s now urging Congress to lock these protections tight so we don’t end up in another chokehold fiasco. 🏛️🙄

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2025-12-02 12:19