🐕 SHIB’s Bizarre Plunge: Shorts Vanish, Longs Weep! 😂

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Ah, mes chers lecteurs, gather ’round and behold the farcical tale of Ethereum’s most whimsical meme coin, the noble Shiba Inu (SHIB)! 🦴 Lo, in a twist most absurd, during a full hour of market despair, not a single short position was liquidated! While the price plummeted to a paltry $0.00000855, the one-hour liquidation data doth reveal that long traders lost a modest $3,950, yet short traders, those cunning scoundrels, lost not a single sou, as reported by the wise sages at CoinGlass. 🧙‍♂️

This comedy of errors continued throughout the session, for on the final day, SHIB’s long positions were fleeced to the tune of $408,210, while shorts merely shrugged off a trifling $23,990. And in the 12-hour window, the imbalance grew more grotesque: $218,940 from the longs, and a mere $7,380 from the shorts! 😱

Mark well the chart, dear friends, for it doth tell a tale of woe! The price of our canine coin hath marked lower highs since its peak near $0.00000925, drifting downward with nary a hint of a squeeze. Even the smallest rebounds failed to ruffle the feathers of those dastardly shorts. 🦜

Why, one might ask, did this calamity befall our dear SHIB? 🧐 Perchance the short interest was but a whisper, too small to suffer great losses, or perhaps SHIB’s descent was so orderly that shorts had no cause to flee. Or, in a twist most ironic, the short sellers arrived fashionably late, after the drop had already commenced. 🤷‍♂️

Regardless, the imbalance doth speak volumes! Liquidation data, usually a symphony of volatility, hath this time played a most discordant tune, especially for a token like SHIB, whose ranks are filled with retail investors. The chart moved, the longs wept, and the shorts remained unscathed. 🤑

But fear not, for this state of affairs cannot endure forever. Yet, for now, ’tis only one side that feels the sting of risk. Alas, the market, like life, is a stage of folly and farce! 🎭

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2026-01-08 18:01