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Senior Director Wes Griffith admitted that customers have not been satisfied. He announced a four-pillar strategy aimed at repairing the relationship with users. 🤷♂️

Arthur Hayes has sold all of his HYPE tokens – 96,628 in total – realizing a profit of about $823,000. While this represents a 19.2% gain, it’s significantly less than the 126x return he had predicted in August. This sale indicates Hayes chose to secure his profits given the current market instability.

Brian Armstrong, the charismatic conjurer behind Coinbase (ticker: COIN), dreams aloud of a financial “super app”-an all-you-can-spend buffet blending crypto kale with traditional finance’s stodgy meatloaf. His words? A siren song to your bank account’s sweet demise.

This metamorphosis, if granted, would cast Dogecoin into the limelight of institutional portfolios, where it might finally rub elbows with the likes of Bitcoin and Ethereum. A Spot ETF, after all, is the velvet rope to the penthouse of financial respectability. Or, as some might call it, the “meme coin with benefits.” 🐶🎩

And what do we have here? Japanese carmakers like Toyota and Yamaha, along with China’s BYD, have started accepting USDT payments in Bolivia. A revolution, or just the usual economic chaos dressed up as progress?

At the zenith of its journey, BNB reached a staggering $1,083, etching its name into the annals of history. Yet, as the sun sets on this triumph, a shadow of caution lingers, for the traders, ever wary, whisper of an impending retreat. 📉

Well, folks, it turns out that not all Bitcoin dreams are made of moon landings. Enter Ramil Ventura Palafox, the charming CEO of Praetorian Group International (PGI), who was running a good ol’ fashioned Ponzi scheme while telling people they could get 3% returns daily. Yes, *daily*. Like your grandmother’s savings account, but with a lot more luxury sports cars. 🏎️

$XRP is a BUY, proclaims the TD Sequential-a tool as mystically precise as a dowsing rod dipped in Excel.

Tether, the crypto titan, is now fleeing Uruguay like a mouse from a cat. Once a pioneer in mining, now a ghost of its former self. The dream of making Uruguay a mining hub? Just a flicker in the dark. 💸

There’s this proposal-PLP 214/2020, drafted by Deputy Paulo Ramos, which is a mouthful, honestly-that basically wants to ban those larger denomination bills. Because apparently, criminals prefer untraceable cash. Who knew? 🤔 They want us all just Venmo-ing each other for everything. Very millennial of them, actually.