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This madcap markdown of riches sent the market tumbling faster than a kangaroo on roller skates, with the total market cap plummeting on the chart faster than your grandma’s old teapot. Based on a TradingView gadget-excluding the safe little stablecoins, Bitcoin [BTC], and Ethereum [ETH]-the market lost a staggering fortune. Yes, a cool $384 billion vanished between its peak and the 21st of November. Poof! Again! 🎩✨

’Tis reported, by the reliably verbose scribes of Reuters, that President Berdymukhamedov – may his reign be long and… interesting – hath affixed his august signature to a decree. This decree, effective come the year of Our Lord 2026, shall permit the registration of those merchants of the intangible – crypto exchanges, and those miners of digital substance.

Oh, Argentina! Just when you think you’ve seen it all, the land of tango, football, and never-ending inflation adds another feather to its cap. Buenos Aires has officially ratified a law permitting citizens to settle their taxes using Dogecoin. In case you’re wondering, Dogecoin is still not considered a “legal tender” (yet!), but hey, the capital city’s got a whole new vibe. It’s 2025, and crypto’s not just for techies anymore-it’s tax season, too. 😏

“We’ll just hasten with the vigor of a man pursued by a pack of wolves,” declared Matt Savarese, Nasdaq’s digital assets alchemist, during a CNBC interview, as if the SEC were a fickle lover demanding a proposal in a fortnight. 🐺

Robert Kiyosaki, author of the best-selling book Rich Dad Poor Dad, has once again reiterated his warnings about mounting global financial risks. His book has remained a perennial best seller for more than two decades, translated into dozens of languages and selling millions of copies worldwide, establishing him as one of the most influential voices in personal finance. 📚✨

Bitcoin’s price has zoomed past $90,000, having crashed below $87,000 earlier this week-because what’s a rollercoaster without a few screams? Ethereum also decided to stop wallowing in the $3,000 gutter and stabilize, probably just trying to look cool. XRP, the little engine that could, jumped roughly 14% in a week-like someone finally realizing they left their keys in the fridge. While these numbers aren’t back to their glory days, US traders are throwing some serious weight around, easing the pain of recent weeks’ downturns. 💪🧙‍♂️

BlackRock, that leviathan of finance, spewed forth $117 million in outflows on Friday, a spectacle as jarring as a debutante at a punk rock concert. 🎩💨 Despite the net inflows, one cannot help but marvel at such audacity. | Source: FarsideInvestors

On the frosty morn of November 28th, a certain Cryptonchain fellow scribbled in their Quicktake ledger that XRP’s price was doin’ the two-step with on-chain goings-on. The key clue? Them “Active Addresses” – the number of wallets tappin’ their toes on the XRP Ledger. A fancy way of sayin’ “retailers are either asleep or out pickin’ cotton.”

Take a look at the daily chart, though, and it’s like a light at the end of a tunnel. Since the catastrophic crash in October, SOL has managed to form its first higher low at $140. Could this be the early whispers of a recovery? Perhaps. Or maybe it’s just the calm before the storm. 😏

Unpopular, perhaps, but it is evidently wiser to sell when the scent of greed fills the air, and to buy when fear reigns supreme. 🤷‍♂️