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In their Friday press release, they couldn’t wait to tell the world that they’ve got around 1,420,173 SOL and its fancy-equivalent assets stashed away, which includes staking rewards and all those juicy on-chain yields. But wait, even after a slight slip – a 4% dip to $184 for Solana as of midday Friday – the value of their treasure chest still looks like a mighty mountain. 💸
Behold, Hyperliquid hath reached not one, not two, but THREE all-time highs! The price flirted with $50, daily perpetual volume surpassed $29 billion (yes, billion!), and buybacks soared past $8.3 million. Truly, this is a spectacle worthy of applause-or perhaps laughter, for who can trust such numbers without questioning their sanity? Yet, these metrics whisper sweet nothings of market demand and protocol prowess, as if Cupid himself were firing arrows into traders’ hearts. ❤️🎯
Enter the villain of our tale: Ianis Aleksandrovich Antropenko, a Russian national with a flair for cybercrime. His weapon of choice? The infamous Zeppelin ransomware. With this diabolical tool, he wreaked havoc on businesses, big and small, across the globe – and even in the land of the free. His method was classic villainous behavior: encrypt and steal data, then demand ransom to return it. A true master of blackmail. 👿
Oh, majestic Bitcoin, ruler of all things blockchain! Alas, even kings must kneel at times. Our beloved king is down by a modest 1%, tumbling below $117k after clinging desperately to $118k for days on end. Trading activity? Down 28%. Volume? A mere $75.79 billion. Yet fear not-it still clutches onto a throne worth $2.34 trillion. Truly, this is high drama fit for Shakespeare himself!
That trend line’s looking as wild as your uncle Frank after a few too many.
Source: TradingView
And guess what? All that moolah is going straight into buying more Bitcoin. Talk about a one-trick pony, but hey, if it works, it works, right? 🐴 The big idea here is to bump up the amount of BTC each share represents, which sounds like a plan to me. 🤔
And how did this grand affair unfold? Why, on a Thursday, no less! Chief State Prosecutor Radim Dragoun, a man known for his eloquence and flair, announced that they were “securing people and things” in a criminal case that had been separated for independent proceedings. One can only imagine the things being secured-perhaps a few exotic pets, a collection of rare stamps, or simply a mountain of Bitcoin?
Le metteur en scène, M. Marché, semble vouloir donner son tonnerre de finale dans… eh bien, dans environ soixante-dix dièses de répliques, soit entre le 15 octobre et le 15 novembre 2025. O tempora, o mores ! 🤹♂️
So, Bitcoin had its moment in the spotlight on Thursday, hitting a shiny new all-time high. But like any good party, it had to come to an end. Now, everyone’s wondering if the market’s just taking a breather or if it’s time to panic and start binge-watching Netflix. 📊 Enter Boris, the crypto trader and on-chain expert, with his deep dive into the BTC market using the magic of supply dynamics. 🧙♂️
The Federal Bureau of Investigation (FBI), that bastion of order in a chaotic world, has noted a disturbing trend: a surge in criminal activity facilitated by these very machines. In 2024 alone, nearly 11,000 complaints of fraud were lodged, amounting to a staggering $246 million. 🤑 And who are the primary targets? The wise and venerable senior citizens, of course, whose trust and goodwill are exploited with alarming frequency. 👵👴
