Crypto News

The research, released just this Wednesday, paints a picture that’s as bleak for traders as it is sparkling for infrastructure providers. It’s like a casino where the house always wins. Traders, the poor souls, mostly lose their shirts in this short-term, high-risk gambling market, while the real winners – the launchpads, decentralized exchanges, and trading bots – are swimming in profits. But hey, someone’s gotta do the hard work, right?

And lo, this frenzied ascent followed a decree from the decentralized altar of Thorswap, promising swaps between ZEC and the golden Bitcoin. How quaint, in an age where privacy is besieged like a besieged fortress! Yet analysts, ever the skeptics, whisper that the true marionette’s string was tugged by Grayscale’s Zcash Trust, a veh rust offered to the elite accredited, so they might partake in securities without the tedium of hoarding the beast itself. 🫣

With a net worth of $150 million-enough to outspend his mother on Parisian couture-he’s achieved what many men twice his age can only dream of: financial triumph and a slight smirk at Melania’s expense. One suspects her designer handbags now whisper his name.

So, Paxos Labs, the people behind the issuance of USAD, will also be managing the reserves for this groundbreaking stablecoin. According to a press release on October 1 (because nothing says “trustworthy” like a press release), USAD will be the very first stablecoin to launch on a layer-1 blockchain with full encryption and privacy. Take that, traditional blockchains! 🧑‍💻

Unfortunately, it’s like giving your grandma a smartphone and expecting her to run a startup. These judges, while competent in their own right, aren’t exactly Web3 experts. So, it’s no surprise that scammers have been able to convince them to ease off, despite the massive crime wave in the digital space. 🙄

Copper Research says usage of the Canton Network, a blockchain built for regulated finance, has quietly surged, with validator activity now including major U.S. exchanges alongside banks and infrastructure firms. *Quietly? Oh, how the mighty roar.*

💼 But wait, there’s more! Bullish didn’t just waltz in with a smile and a handshake. Oh no, they brought the big guns: a BitLicense and a Money Transmission License from the NYDFS. That’s like showing up to a potluck with a five-course meal. 🍴 Now they’re rubbing elbows with the elite, the crème de la crème of exchanges approved to operate in New York. Talk about a VIP pass!

Circle (CRCL), the USDC stablecoin overlords, has declared war on Solana, flooding its low-cost, lightning-fast blockchain with their tokenized Treasury fund. A bold move, or a desperate gamble? Only time will tell-but at least the cows are happy. 🐄⚡

“PI could break through key resistances and surprise investors with a rally into the $0.40-$0.50 range, establishing itself as one of the standout performers of the month.”