Crypto News

Over the past week, you’ve shed 15% faster than I shed my New Year’s resolutions. Selling accelerated, and now you’re flirting with your September lows. Classic ARB, always keeping it dramatic! 🎭

The crypto circus doesn’t stop at coders. Product managers, CTOs, and compliance officers juggle their way to fat paychecks, proving there’s a ringmaster for every act. 🎪

Kab Lae Kim, a sage from the Korea Capital Market Institute, stood upon the podium of a local conference and proclaimed this audacious idea on Monday. The NPS, with its coffers overflowing with $930 billion (KRW 1,185 trillion), stands as the third-largest pension fund in the world-a titan, yet perhaps, a tad traditional. 🧐

Bitcoin’s price may be wobblier than a Jenga tower after a few too many, but the on-chain data is telling a different story. The Coin Days Destroyed (CDD) metric-which, let’s be honest, sounds like something a cryptographer dreamed up after too much coffee-has taken a nosedive. 📉 This means our seasoned crypto veterans are clutching their coins like they’re the last slice of pizza at a party. 🍕

The market’s collective breath held, as bullish whispers echoed through the halls of crypto, their voices resonating with the conviction of those who believe in the alchemy of numbers. Bulls, ever the optimists, argue that liquidity and demand, like the steadfast currents of a river, have fortified HYPE’s case for grandeur. And lo! Kathy Wood, that oracle of innovation, has likened Hyperliquid to Solana, a comparison as audacious as likening a candle to the sun. 🌟

The acquisition, revealed in a modest SEC filing (because nothing says romance like regulatory paperwork), occurred at an average price of $113,048 per coin. BTC began the week strutting above $112,000, only to slink below $110,000 by Thursday. A tragedy in four days. 🕯️

BeInCrypto, ever the optimist, has dredged up three altcoins that might just touch the sky as October unfolds. Or crash and burn. Who knows? Life’s a gamble, comrades! 🎲

Let me get this straight: The SEC, the same group that once called Bitcoin a “fraud,” is suddenly best friends with crypto? Either they’ve lost their minds, or someone’s slipping them Dogecoin-shaped cookies. 🍪 Either way, get ready for a wild ride. Your grandma’s about to buy an ETF and call it “smart investing.” 😂

Behold, the enigmatic Darkfost, a sage of the blockchain, unveils a tale of woe: the flow of transactions from the esteemed wholecoiners-those rare beings who possess at least one full Bitcoin-has dwindled to its nadir since November 2023. These guardians of the coin, once the bedrock of market faith, now retreat like timid sparrows in the face of adversity. 🐦💸

And on the very same day, as if the gods of leverage were feeling generous, Binance Futures will unfurl the TRUTHUSDT perpetual contract, offering up to 50x leverage at 12:30 (UTC). A contract, mind you, that promises to turn chalk into cheese and risk into a spectator sport, all under the banner of progress and thirst for more digits. 🤖💬