And now these “analysts” are looking at… “on-chain data.” What *is* on-chain data? Is it like, a digital paper trail? Sounds messy. Anyway, this CryptoOnchain guy – great name, by the way, very trustworthy – is saying something about MVRV Price Bands. It’s a “metric.” Of course it is. Everything’s a metric these days. 🙄
The Treasury, ever the meticulous chronicler, issued both an Advisory and a Financial Trend Analysis, as if drawing a map through the dense fog of financial deceit, guiding banks to the treacherous waters where trouble lurks. 🧭📉
So David Schwartz, Ripple’s CTO, finally decided to put an end to the endless chatter about forking XRP. You know, like when your friend says they’re “thinking about starting a podcast,” but then they never actually do it? Same energy here.
So, guess what? Chainlink [LINK] and the U.S Department of Commerce (DOC) have decided to team up. Yes, you heard that right. On 28 August, they announced plans to bring macroeconomic data onto the blockchain. Six data points – including Real GDP Level, PCE Price Index, and all the things you probably didn’t ask for – will be available. It’s going to be updated monthly or quarterly, depending on how the government feels about it.
Unlike most blockchain networks that demand arcane coding languages, GCUL runs on Python-because nothing says “trust us” like a language used by quants and cat video creators alike. 🐱
New York, the city that never sleeps, will host the grand gathering from November 4 to 5. The lineup is a veritable feast for the soul, featuring Ripple CEO Brad Garlinghouse, Co-founder Chris Larsen, President Monica Long, Nasdaq’s Chair Adena Friedman, and the culinary magician, José Andrés. But wait, there’s more! Executives from BlackRock, Fidelity, Bitwise, Citi, CME Group, and Franklin Templeton are also joining the party. It’s like a who’s who of the financial world, all gathered under one roof. 🏃♂️💨
//www.youtube.com/live/rBVdFCEC0vI?si=BvMibWMuV8wuJE7Q”>said
Just yesterday, the SPX6900 stumbled fiercely, falling 12% faster than a drunk man off a rooftop at midnight. The market’s very bones are rattling under the weight of this sudden plunge.
This peculiar formation, they claim, is a sign that selling pressure is slinking off to the corner with a damp handkerchief-often the prelude to a grand escape act. Vespamatic, ever the optimist, predicts a $4 finale, suggesting momentum-driven rallies might erupt like a startled goose if resistance levels are breached. “It’s like watching a toddler with a slingshot,” they added. “You never know where the grapes will fly.” 🍇💥
In an episode that could give even the most stubborn Bitcoin fans a twitch, DeFi Dev Corp has decided, “Hey! Let’s buy more SOL!” like it’s the last slice of pizza at a party. The latest scoop? They’ve snagged a whopping 407,247 SOL, at a mere bargain price of $188.68 each-about $76.8 million worth! Talk about a shopping spree, huh? Now, with over 1.8 million SOL tucked under their belt-worth around $371 million-they’re practically the crypto version of Scrooge McDuck diving into his money bin. 🦆💦