Incredibly bullish news for Bitcoin keeps raining down like a confetti cannon gone wild. On Thursday, President Trump, in his infinite wisdom, signed an executive order allowing US citizens to sprinkle a bit of $BTC into their 401(k) savings plans. And just when you thought it couldn’t get any more pro-crypto, he signed another order preventing banks from turning up their noses at crypto companies. 🎉
Cast your mind back, dear reader, to February 26, 2025, a day of glory when Pi touched the heavens at $2.98. Since then, it has plummeted like a misjudged joke at a funeral-nearly 88% down. On August 6, 2025, it hit rock bottom, though it now wobbles slightly upward, like a drunkard attempting to regain his dignity. The question lingers, thick as borscht: can Pi ever reclaim the $1 throne? 🧐
Having established a sturdy foundation above the $2.85 level, XRP has embarked on a fresh journey of growth, outpacing even the venerable Bitcoin and Ethereum. With a newfound momentum, it has deftly navigated past the resistance levels of $3.10 and $3.15, much like a skilled dancer gliding across the floor.
Yet, dear reader, not all traders are swayed by the siren call of Ether’s current ascent. Indeed, some remain steadfast in their skepticism regarding the sustainability of this upward trend.
David Sacks, the White House’s crypto maestro, declared on X that the illustrious Donald Trump has inked two decrees so bold, they could make Molière himself roll in his grave (or perhaps write a new play). These orders, he claims, will revolutionize banking, retirement, and the very soul of American finance.
Bitcoin found a cozy spot near $112,200, decided to do a little dance and climb past $113,500 and $114,800 – quite the upgrade! 💃
Our dear Hedera [HBAR], in its latest theatrical appearance, has theatrically slinked below the Value Area High at $0.264. This was charted (oh, the suspense!) via the Fixed Range Volume Profile, covering everything from the beginning of the year to today’s antics.
Behold, dear reader, the blockchain’s heart pounds with frenzied transactions, a symphony of digital gold. Ethereum [ETH], that elusive specter, has danced upward 8% this week, reclaiming its throne after a brief dalliance with $3,941. One might call it a phoenix rising from the ashes-or perhaps a cat with 8% more tail. 🐾
Still, there’s a rumor, passed from screen to cracked screen, that 174 million coins could tumble out of escrow like loose oats from a torn sack. If those July warrants wake up hungry, the buying could surge and the price might straighten its back and walk tall again. Till then the $0.95 wall squats in the road like an ornery mule, stubborn and unmoved, kicking sideways every hopeful tick that tries to pass. You watch the wall long enough, you start to talk to it. Mostly it laughs. 😂
Tether, that bold money-handling outfit, has gone and bought itself a tiny piece of Bit2Me’s pie, and is throwing in a cool €30 million to boot. Rumor has it, the deal’s closing faster than a bull at a rodeo. This gives Bit2Me the trots to gallop across the European plains and beyond, expanding faster than a Texas prairie fire.
