Crypto News

As the wise CryptoWzrd points out, both the daily candles for Chainlink and its scrappy cousin, LINK/BTC, closed with all the conviction of a politician on election day. This here lack of directional clarity means that neither the buyers nor the sellers are in the driver’s seat, reinforcing the old adage that patience is indeed a virtue-one that would do well to be exercised while prices continue to twiddle their thumbs in consolidation.

Behold, the arithmetic of despair: 26% in seven days, a descent from $432 to $378, as if the market itself weeps at the folly of its trust. ZEC now languishes 50% below its 2025 high-a monument to hubris and half-baked algorithms. 🪙📉

At this moment, Cosmos [ATOM] pirouettes at $2.64-a fleeting waltz of 8.2% on daily charts and 19% weekly, as if the market itself has been seduced by its charm. Volume swells like a heartbeat, and market cap blooms like a rose in the spring. Yet, one wonders: is this a genuine embrace or merely a fleeting flirtation? 🌹

This “Plan C” person – sounds like a heist movie – is saying the business cycle hasn’t done its thing yet. Apparently, Bitcoin peaks when the business cycle hits between 55 and 65. Right now, we’re at… under 50. So, basically, we haven’t even really warmed up the party yet. 🤔 It’s like saying, “Don’t worry, the hangover hasn’t even started!”

Picture this: Friday’s dramatic scene with Solana taking a nearly 4% nosedive after one too many curtain calls on its resistance stage. Lately, the altcoin has been living on the edge, trading between $120-$145 since that early November fall. It’s as if it keeps going through a breakup that’s just too hard to let go of.

South Korea is officially rolling out a Spot Bitcoin ETF by 2026. Because nothing says “economic stability” like betting the farm on a digital ledger. 🐄💻

Here we stand, in a world where the ledger of wealth is both phantom and fiery, where Dogecoin now frolics with strength, bolstered by the clandestine gathering of a mighty whale. Over 218 million DOGE, in the twinkling of an eye, over 12 hours, conjured a surge of confidence in this modern myth of currencies.

BNY’s latest trick? Mirroring institutional clients’ cash balances on a private blockchain. A noble endeavor, one might say, if you ignore the fact that banks have been “innovating” since the invention of the ledger. 🕵️‍♂️ The service kicks off with collateral and margin workflows-those sacred rituals of the financial priesthood. BNY’s traditional systems keep records in their own private blockchain, which is just a fancy way of saying, “We’re too busy to trust anyone else.”

The report addressed a major concern for cryptocurrency markets, but it’s not enough to cause prices to quickly return to $100,000.

As of this galactic press time, HYPE is hovering around $25, with a market cap of $6 billion. That’s enough to rank it #31 in the crypto circus, but let’s be honest, who’s counting? Oh, right, everyone. Anyway, it’s down nearly 3% in the last 24 hours, despite a modest 2% gain over the past week. So, it’s basically the financial equivalent of taking one step forward and then face-planting into a cake. 🍰😩