Oh, the Follies of Crypto! Bitcoin’s Plunge & Cardano’s Woes

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  1. Ah, behold! Bitcoin, that fickle mistress, doth tumble below $72,000, as Strategy, with a flourish, unburdened itself of 32 coins for a mere $2.5 million. A pittance, say I!
    38 minutes past
  2. And lo, the Cardano Summit of 2026, a grand affair, hath been cast into the void! The ungrateful community spurned the Foundation’s purse.
    1 hour past
  3. Strategy, ever the steadfast soul, doth cling to its STRC dividend at 11.5%, for the fourth moon in succession.
    2 hours past
  4. Bitcoin and Ether, those star-crossed lovers, commence June in sorrow, while futures whisper of daring souls. XLM and HYPE, the jesters, gain.
    2 hours past
  5. Alas, Bitcoin and software stocks part ways, and the augurs proclaim a great crypto tempest is nigh.
    2 hours past
  6. The U.S. Congress returns, as GENIUS closes its lips, and the jobs report looms. A Crypto Week of mirth and woe!
    3 hours past
  7. Citi, that wise oracle, foretells the tokenized securities market shall swell to $5.5 trillion by 2030. Mark my words!
    5 hours past
  8. A whitehat knight, with skill and guile, doth unlock $2 million from an Ethereum ICO contract, slumbering since 2016.
    5 hours past
  9. XRP, poor soul, sinks to $1.32, as sellers hold sway.
    7 hours past
  10. Three times the Sui mainnet hath halted in 48 hours, a bug, they say, the culprit. Oh, the folly of upgrades!
    7 hours past

The Pre-IPO Perpetuals Category Takes Shape

The Pre-IPO Perpetuals Category Takes Shape

Binance, that grand theater of trade, launched Pre-IPO perpetuals on May 21. In a trice, it seized >60% of the realm, with SPACEX reigning at 79%. A comedy of numbers!

By CoinDesk Research
May 29, 2026

Why it matters:

Binance, that grand theater of trade, launched Pre-IPO perpetuals on May 21. In a trice, it seized >60% of the realm, with SPACEX reigning at 79%. A comedy of numbers!

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Bitcoin below $72,000 as Strategy sold 32 bitcoin for $2.5 million in late May. A sale most modest!

Strategy holds STRC dividend at 11.5% for the fourth month. Steadfast, though the world be mad!

Bitcoin and Ether start June in the red, while futures tempt the bold. XLM and HYPE, the jesters, gain.

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2026-06-01 15:46