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The second luminary of the crypto heavens, Ethereum, finds itself entangled in what one might call a peculiar and somewhat alarming development-a descent into volatility so profound that it borders on nonexistence. With ETH languishing stubbornly around the $4,295 mark after weeks of insipid activity, price fluctuations have all but evaporated. Such torpor is hardly conducive to a market fueled by momentum, is it not?

Sure, they *might* still sell NFTs in their “21st Century Art” category, but let’s be honest-that’s like saying you’ll still eat Brussels sprouts. Unlikely. 😏

Apparently, some analysts on X (yeah, that’s what they call Twitter now, don’t ask) like @TehLamboXcharts and @ali_charts are saying ENA’s got a bull flag breakout. 🚩 Big deal. It’s approaching $0.77, which is, you know, a critical support and resistance level. Whatever that means. Warrior Trading (2023) says bull flags usually mean 20-50% gains in bullish markets. Or maybe it’s just a fluke. Who’s keeping track? 🤔

The whispers of Tether’s Bitcoin sell-offs began to murmur through the financial forests after quarterly reports revealed a slight decline in its Bitcoin reserves. Yet, both Ardoino and the ever-eloquent Samson Mow, CEO of Jan3, have kindly reminded us that no such sales occurred. On the contrary, Tether’s affection for Bitcoin grows stronger with each passing day, much like the bond between an old oak and its roots. 🌳💔

On-chain data reveals something peculiar: dip-buying, that noble act of purchasing coins when they’re cheap, is alive and well. Glassnode’s HODL waves show that the 1-2 year holding cohort has grown from 21.65% to 23.24% in just a month. Yes, dear reader, long-term holders are clinging to their Dogecoins like a child to their favorite blanket. What faith! What conviction! Or perhaps, what sheer inability to admit defeat?

The company, in their usual optimistic tone, insists that this theft is confined to the particular service affected, although it must be said that the loss represents a rather substantial chunk of their Solana holdings. Nonetheless, in a move that will surely reassure their customers, SwissBorg has pledged to attempt a partial refund of the stolen assets, even if those funds cannot be fully recovered.

The inaugural purchase of this peculiar endeavor was none other than a piece of digital art from the illustrious CryptoPunk collection, a series so revered that it is often hailed as the genesis of Ethereum’s NFT profile picture (PFP) revolution. One cannot help but ponder the irony of such a creation, born from the digital ether, now commanding the attention and wealth of the world’s elite. 🤔💰

As of September 9, 2025, Bitcoin sits pretty near $111,917, up a modest 0.7% over the past day. Not exactly fireworks, but hey, at least it’s not plummeting into oblivion. Trading volume clocks in around $25.57 billion, which means traders are still placing their bets like poker players at a smoky table.

It appears that his fortune has bloomed like a Bitcoin plant in full spring. Reports have leaked that his wealth surged by a cool $1 billion since the dawn of 2025-essentially a 16% increase this year. Maybe he’s been buying low and praying for the best… or maybe his Bitcoin stash is just paying him a lovely little dividend. 🧑‍💻

Enter Daan Crypto, the cryptic soothsayer of the crypto realm, who warns us that Bitcoin is teetering on the brink of a precipitous drop below $100,000. But fear not, dear readers, for even in the darkest hour, a glimmer of hope remains. The bulls, those valiant defenders of value, still stand a chance to orchestrate a grand recovery rally in the coming weeks. 🦁