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On the 18th of August, the Deputy Prime Minister, Mr. Pichai Chunhavajira, with a flourish worthy of a Victorian dandy, proclaimed this project a triumph of convenience. It simplifies the use of digital assets in daily life, while offering foreign tourists a smorgasbord of payment options. Alas, direct crypto payments are verboten; one must first convert their digital trinkets into the national currency. A prudent move, no doubt, to shield merchants from the capricious whims of the crypto market. 🛡️💹

On Monday, a significant number of one million contracts for the $4 call option expiring on December 26, each representing 1,000 units of XRP, were traded off-exchange in a large, private transaction known as a block trade, and subsequently recorded on Deribit exchange.

With a stablecoin framework in the works, the Treasury is strutting its stuff, trying to shape the Web3 sector like a potter with a lump of clay. Under the watchful eye of Trump, they’re aiming to boost crypto innovation while keeping it as safe as a kitten in a basket. 🐱✨

What is this “metric”? Like studying the seriousness of a literary salon based on the quantity of teacups consumed in 15 days, it examines both the mass of the entities and the bitcoin snatched up recently. There is humor in such method, yet it remains relentless.

One wallet, connected to FalconX inflows, has been acquiring Bitcoin with a scheme most deliberate 😉. Yesterday alone, it swallowed 300 BTC ($34.71M), bringing its monthly haul to 1,521 BTC ($176.27M). One might mistake it for a lottery winner, though I suspect this “lucky” whale has a plan sharper than a London tailor’s scissors.

In a cryptic scroll dated August 19, XWIN Research Japan declared stablecoins the “dry powder” of the crypto arsenal. Record supply! Swelling reserves! Inflows! All heralding… something. A rally? A farce? The return of the whales? 🐘

And get this, in the wee hours of August 19, LINK hit a high of $26.6, a feat not seen in seven months. As of right now, the cryptocurrency is trading at $24.17 with a market cap of $16.4 billion. Talk about a comeback kid! 🏆🔥

The 4-hour frame exposes a preposterous bull flag, not unlike a contraption devised by a sleep-deprived inventor. The bulls attempt one escapade up and numerous deceiving dips downward, yet, alas, they mercifully find themselves in a sideways frenzy. However, they’ve been herded back into the flag, where their futile attempts towards the summit are soundly quashed by the bears, returning them flat-footedly to their confinement.

“How quaint,” mused the indefatigable analyst and economist Alex Krüger on Tuesday, “that every time the markets execute a modest plié from their peaks, the masses commence their ritualistic hand-wringing over the cycle’s demise.”

Word has drifted, carried on the whispers of the news-writers, that the Financial Services Commission (FSC), that venerable body charged with safeguarding the nation’s coffers, intends to unveil a set of rules governing these won-pegged stablecoins. Within two months, they say. One suspects, however, that “two months” is a fluid concept, much like the value of these very tokens they seek to control. 😮