It is a truth universally acknowledged that whenever Bitcoin flexes its muscles, someone somewhere will start calculating Satoshi Nakamoto’s fortune. And lo and behold, with Bitcoin now strutting above $118,000 like a peacock at a garden party, the elusive Satoshi has amassed a cool $130 billion. Yes, you read that correctly—$130 billion! If this doesn’t inspire you to dig up your old floppy disks in search of forgotten crypto keys, I don’t know what will. 😉
- The $130 billion whale 🐋: These coins have been gathering digital dust since 2009. One wonders if Satoshi is sitting on a beach somewhere sipping piña coladas or simply lost their password like the rest of us mortals.
Blockchain detectives (yes, they exist) believe Satoshi’s stash consists of roughly 1.1 million BTC—all untouched since Bitcoin’s infancy. Imagine owning something worth more than several small countries combined and never once checking your balance. It’s almost poetic—or perhaps just maddeningly frustrating for those who dropped their life savings into meme coins last year. 😅
XRP Takes Center Stage, Leaves Bitcoin Looking Like Yesterday’s News 🌟
In other news, XRP has decided it no longer wishes to live in Bitcoin’s shadow and has stormed ahead with institutional inflows reaching a staggering $189 million. Meanwhile, poor old Bitcoin had the audacity to experience outflows totaling $175 million. How gauche! Clearly, even cryptocurrencies get tired of being trendy all the time.
- Surpassing Bitcoin: XRP didn’t just beat Bitcoin—it gave it a good-natured pat on the back while whispering, “Better luck next time, champ.”
With July MTD totals hitting $11.2 billion, XRP has officially broken records faster than one can say “blockchain revolution.”
Dogecoin: Dropping Prices but Still Winning Hearts ❤️
Ah, Dogecoin—the little engine that could… until it couldn’t. Over the past seven days, DOGE took a nosedive of 10.75%, leaving some investors clutching their pearls. But fear not! For every cloud has a silver lining, and in Dogecoin’s case, that lining comes in the form of bullish futures activity.
- Weekly price drop: DOGE down 10.75%. Cue dramatic sighs from Shiba Inu enthusiasts worldwide.
Despite its recent tumble, open interest in Dogecoin futures surged by 5.98% within 24 hours. Investors committed a whopping 18.15 billion DOGE, valued at $4.38 billion, to the futures market. This suggests that DOGE holders remain optimistic about future gains—or perhaps they’re just hoping Elon Musk tweets about it again. 🐶💸
- Bullish sentiment: Open interest jumped +5.98% in 24 hours. Someone clearly thinks DOGE is poised for greatness—or at least another viral moment.
For those unfamiliar with financial jargon, open interest refers to the number of unsettled futures contracts floating around cyberspace. The fact that it increased so dramatically indicates that DOGE enthusiasts are betting big on a rebound. Whether this optimism is justified remains to be seen—but hey, isn’t hope what keeps us all going? 🌈
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2025-07-30 02:31