Vitalik Buterin: The Billionaire Who Doesn’t Care About Billionaires 😅

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Oh, Vitalik Buterin. The man who co-founded Ethereum, changed the blockchain game, and still manages to look like he’s perpetually pondering whether socks are truly necessary. According to a report by Arkham Intelligence (shared on X, because of course it was), his net worth is-at the very least-$1.05 billion. A billion, you say? For someone who once donated $20 billion worth of SHIB tokens to charity without blinking 🐕‍🦺, that seems almost… quaint.

The backbone of this fortune? Ether, naturally. Arkham says Buterin holds about 240,042 ETH in known wallets, with over 99% of his crypto portfolio tied to ETH. At the time of writing, ETH was sitting pretty at $4,321, which translates to roughly $1.04 billion in Ether alone. So yes, if Ether sneezes, Vitalik’s net worth catches a cold. Or buys another yacht he’ll never use 🛥️.

Let’s take a trip down memory lane, shall we? Back in December 2015, his crypto wealth was a modest $596,760. By 2016, it had grown to $4.23 million, and by 2017-ah, the sweet smell of a bull run-it skyrocketed to $278.37 million. His first billionaire moment came in 2021 when he turned 27, making him the youngest self-made billionaire since Zuckerberg probably ate his first Pop-Tart 🧈. He peaked at $2.09 billion in November 2021, only for the bear market to slap him back down to $300.58 million by the end of 2022. But hey, resilience is key! By 2024-2025, he bounced back to $1.05 billion. Not bad for someone whose idea of fun is debating zk-SNARKs at dinner parties 🍽️.

And let’s not forget the memecoin saga. In May 2021, half the supply of SHIB was sent to him, briefly inflating his net worth to $20 billion. Did he cash out? No. He donated it all to charity. Because apparently being rich isn’t as thrilling when you’re too busy building decentralized systems to care 💸.

Now, where does Vitalik stand among other Ethereum whales? Well, the ETH2 deposit contract holds a whopping 66,887,347.41 ETH, followed by exchanges and ETF custody clusters. But Vitalik? He’s the largest identifiable individual holding his own coins. Meanwhile, some poor Estonian banker named Rain Lõhmus sits on ~250,000 ETH that might as well be buried treasure, thanks to lost keys 🔑. Poor guy.

Vitalik himself has been refreshingly transparent about his holdings. Back in 2018, he clarified: “I never had 900k ETH. When I had 0.9% of all ETH, the supply was ~75 million.” Translation: yes, he’s sold or donated portions over time, but no, he hasn’t hoarded like a dragon guarding its gold 🐉.

What about non-ETH tokens, you ask? Oh, they’re adorable. Arkham reports holdings like 10,000,000,000 WHITE (~$3.72 million), 30,000,000,000 MOODENG (~$690,000), and 869,509 KNC (~$327,000). There’s also $12,400 of TORN linked to Tornado Cash usage and a smidge of SHIB left behind (~$2,720). Honestly, it feels like finding spare change under your couch cushions-but multiplied by a thousand 🛋️.

And here’s the kicker: Vitalik doesn’t even act like your typical crypto bro. In 2022, he admitted using Tornado Cash-not for shady dealings, mind you, but to donate anonymously to Ukraine 🇺🇦. Likewise, exchange-bound transfers from his wallets since 2018? All donations. None of that “yacht fund” nonsense.

Oh, and off-chain investments? Arkham hints at early stakes in StarkWare, now valued at $8 billion after their Series D round. Illiquid? Sure. Meaningful? Absolutely. But again, precise numbers remain elusive, so $1.05 billion stays the conservative baseline. Because why inflate things when humility is far more interesting? 🤷‍♂️

At press time, Ethereum traded at $4,298. Will Vitalik notice? Probably not. He’s likely too busy coding or explaining why Proof-of-Stake is superior to Proof-of-Work to random strangers online 👨‍💻.

In conclusion, Vitalik Buterin is living proof that money can’t buy everything-like socks, enthusiasm, or the ability to enjoy small talk. Cheers to the billionaire who doesn’t want to be one 🥂!

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2025-09-08 10:45