As of October 25, 2025, Bitcoin, that fickle siren of the financial seas, trades near $111,000, with the MACD histogram turning as positive as a debutante at her first ball. Max Crypto (@MaxCryptoxx), a strategist of dubious repute, chirps: “$BTC MACD golden cross is about to happen. The last one resulted in a new ATH within a week.” One wonders if he consults tea leaves or tarot cards in his spare moments. 🃏☕
From the dusty archives of Artemis, a blockchain oracle in New York, comes word of a stampede: stablecoins galloping across sectors like a herd of unshackled mustangs. Yet the tollbooths-those greedy little devils-demand fees that rival the old-world bankers. A cruel joke, really.
Yet, the industry clings to its disclaimers like a drunk to a lamppost, insisting intent and liability can be divorced. But once the software wields the power to move funds, to publish prices, the burden of proof shifts. Input proofs, action constraints, audit trails-these are not luxuries but lifelines. 🛟
This here Ledger Multisig contraption? It slaps a flat ten-dollar levy on every transaction ‘cept token swaps, them that rake in a sly 0.05% cut, piled atop the blockchain’s own stinging gas fees, which ain’t Ledger’s kin at all. It’s like the landlord demandin’ rent on top of the sweat-soaked toil-the eternal squeeze, comrades, where the little guy’s pockets bleed a mite more. 😂
Indeed, as the tides of fate began to ebb and flow in favor of those ambitious souls at Ripple, the figurehead Brad Garlinghouse emerged from the shadows, like a modern-day Prometheus, free at last from the chains of litigation. How masterfully he acknowledged his enterprise’s recent ventures before the vast digital amphitheater known as X! The man is practically a bard of the blockchain.
Altcoin Daily – yeah, I know, they sound like the Instagram influencer of crypto – says, if you missed Bitcoin’s best days, you might as well have invested in Beanie Babies. Seriously. They crunched the numbers from 2013 to 2024, and turns out, if you missed the “magic days,” you probably lost money. Who would’ve thought, huh?
Big banks are dipping their toes in, global regulators are scribbling down clearer rules (we think), and digital assets are becoming the cool kids at the finance party. 🥳
Here’s the deal: Crypto.com got that US trust bank charter, which is like getting a gold star from the teacher, but for adults. 🎖️ Plus, rumors are swirling that Trump’s camp might be eyeing CRO for their crypto ETFs. Because, you know, nothing says “institutional adoption” like a Trump-branded ETF. 🤡 All this while the charts were like, “Yeah, let’s breakout.” Classic Larry David levels of chaos. 🌪️
On the fateful day of October 24, REX-Osprey, with a flourish of its quill, proclaimed that its XRPR had surpassed this milestone, a testament to the insatiable hunger of the financial elite for a taste of the crypto pie. 🥧💼
In an act as ceremonious as a diplomatic treaty, Bonk Holdings has declared itself the grand inaugural BONK Digital Asset Treasury (DAT). They’ve wisely acquired these tokens through FalconX, securing them in a Solana Squad Multisig wallet via Fireblocks-ensuring multi-signature protection akin to the assurances one requires when investing in a Russian vodka merchant. CEO Jarrett Boon proclaimed, “This aligns our illustrious public company with a dashing digital asset platform, uncovering long-term value and fortifying BONK’s esteemed position in institutional circles.” Such language promises much, yet history teaches us to temper excitement.
